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2025 MILFORD STEVENSON ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
SEP 22, 2024
The Trap of “By Now”
Ever looked in the mirror and thought, “I should be further ahead by now”?
It starts as a whisper. A faint unease in the back of your mind.
You barely notice it at first. Life keeps moving, and so do you.
But then, one day, it hits you.
You look in the mirror and realize time has been passing faster than you thought
A creeping anxiety settles in, not because you fear aging, but because something inside you is stirring: a realization that you are no longer just living.
You are watching life happen, measuring it against expectations you never questioned.
For some, this moment arrives in their 30s.
For others, in their 40s. But when it comes, it doesn’t leave.
Not because you want to dwell on time, but because you begin to wonder if you have truly lived.
The Trap of “By Now”
The biggest mistake we make is tying the quality of our lives to the ticking of a clock.
↳ I should have accomplished this by now.
↳ I should have bought that house by now.
↳ I should have graduated college by now.
↳ I should have been married by now.
↳ I should have had kids by now.
↳ I should have reached the peak of my career by now.
We live with an invisible checklist, believing that happiness is something we achieve instead of something we experience
But here’s the truth:
The quality of your life is not measured by time.
It is measured by the depth of your experiences.
You Already Have Everything You Need Take a deep breath.
Let me walk you through something.
You don’t need to earn the right to exist.
The heart in your chest beats without your permission.
The air in your lungs flows freely.
Your ears take in sound.
Your eyes capture the world around you.
Your mind holds infinite possibilities.
You have already been given everything you need to create the life you desire.
But somewhere along the way, you lost sight of this.
Not because you were careless.
Not because you were weak.
But because the world convinced you that happiness comes later.
That success comes next.
That peace is something to be earned.
But it isn’t.
What you seek is not a matter of need. It is a matter of want.
So ask yourself: What do I truly want?
You Were Created to Create There’s an old saying: The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.
If you come from a Creator, then you, too, have the power to create.
You can create a new life.
A new path.
A new reality.
But it will not happen by waiting.
It will not happen by hoping.
It will not happen by following an invisible timeline set by people who do not live your life.
It will happen when you decide.
↳ What kind of life do I want?
↳ What kind of relationships do I want?
↳ What kind of career do I want?
↳ What kind of fulfillment do I want?
And the most fundamental question of all:
Who am I?
Because once you answer that, everything else becomes clear.
The Illusion of “Later”
Most people wait.
They wait for the right moment.
They wait for more money.
They wait for the kids to leave home.
They wait for the divorce to be final.
They wait to graduate.
They wait for a promotion.
They wait for permission.
They wait until they wake up one day and realize they waited too long.
The time is not later.
The time is not next year.
The time is not when life feels easier.
The time is now.
The Moment That Changed My Life
Everything shifted for me when I stopped waiting for life to change on its own.
I used to believe that if I worked hard enough, if I proved myself enough, if I played by the rules long enough, the life I wanted would simply arrive.
But it never did.
Because life doesn’t reward those who wait.
It rewards those who decide.
So I made a decision.
A firm, unwavering decision that I would not live by the expectations of others.
That I would not chase illusions.
That I would not pretend to be someone I wasn’t just to fit into a timeline I never agreed to.
Instead, I chose to take control.
And from that moment, everything changed.
What Do You Really Want?
Not what society tells you.
Not what your family expects of you.
Not what you think you should do.
What do you want?
Sit with that question. Feel it. Let it settle in your bones.
Then go after it with everything you have.
Because the clock isn’t the enemy.
The real enemy is waiting.